Monday, January 30, 2006

EFFING CRABS! (or, *KERSPLASH!*)

Well after months of biding my time, it finally happened...I fell into Town Lake.

I knew falling in was inevitable, but I had really hoped it would maybe be in July or August, when falling in would be rather refreshing.

But no, I fell in:

*During Mid-January, and while this is Texas, the water was still pretty freaking cold...

*On a particularly gross water day...Town Lake is never the epitome of clean, but the floating dead duck and cloudy water and debris were not super encouraging. Come on.

So here's what happened: Erin and I rig our sculls and I have this debate in my head about whether I should put my SMC ring back in my bag all the way in the locker room, or just tie it to my shoelace...something tells me I should really put it in my bag in the locker room. So I do.

Sign #1.

Erin and I back out and can't get over how gross and cloudy the water looks.

Sign #2.

Erin and I get going and the wind is a little obnoxious and my foot stretchers are making this annoying *creak creak* sound. We pass Joe's Crab Shack and notice some random guy swimming around the lake. Random guy yells out about water being gross.

Sign #3.

Erin and I go under the 35 bridge and get some water. She says while in theory she could go down to Longhorn damn, she doesn't need to. I am feeling pretty uncomfortable at this point and don't particularly want to go all the down there either. Erin makes another comment about how gross the water is, and further adds, "Today's not the day I want to go in the water." We make jokes about falling in and how it would be ideal to do it in July. Silly silly girls.

Sign #4.

We go down to the yellow dock, turn around, I am feeling more and more uncomfortable, I've already had a couple close calls, Erin asks if I'm ok. I'm fine, just really ready to get back. We cross under 35 again and row past a dead duck floating in the water.

I don't know if I'd classify that as a sign or an omen.

I have another close call, we stop for water and talk about how we can't wait to get back to the dock, this row sucks, the weather is crap, what is up with this NASTY water, and I whine about my back hurting.

This was the last sign I was going to get.

I start up, don't square my oars well due to wind and waves, but recover...it happens again, and this time...I don't recover. My right oar catches a major crab, and I go spilling into the water.

The first thing I thought was "Son of a bitch it's f-ing cold!!!"

The second thing I thought was "My shoes are gone!"

The third thing I thought was "Son of a bitch it's f-ing cold!!!"

The fourth thing I thought was "Thank God I decided not to be lazy and put my SMC ring back in my bag"

The fifth thing I thought was "Hooray my shoes (amazingly enough) are still there!"

And the only thing I thought after that was "Son of a bitch it's cold" and "How the hell am I gonna get back in the boat???"

For those of you who have never sculled...it's not like just climbing into a little rowboat. Because your oars keep it balanced, you have to make sure they're straightened out, then hold onto them to hoist yourself back in.

Well this went on and on for a looooong time. And everytime Erin tried to maneuver her boat to hold onto my oar (risking falling in herself) the current and/or wind would move her or me away.

Finally, after debating swimming (with my boat in tow of course, I watched the safety video) to shore, Erin managed to get on the side of me and hold my oar, and I hoisted myself in...banging myself hard on the edge as I swung my leg over (Thank GOD I'm not a boy) and almost losing my socks.

We sat there and calmed down for a few minutes and then I had to get back on dry land.

So we rowed...CAREFULLY back to the dock. As we were making our way in, we notice the police speed boat barreling across, and another officer out on the dock asking us if we had seen anyone in the water.

Hee.

Apparently he couldn't see water-drenched me very well...and actually I don't know if they were even looking for me or for someone else, but if they were...kudos to the city of Austin on the quick response time...and kudos to whoever the nice person was who possibly saw me fall in.

And a huge gi-normous kudos to Erin who:
1. Kept me from panicking (too much).
2. Got my ass back in the boat.
3. Lent me her Teva sandals, walking in front of the Four Seasons in workout pants and high-heels, all for my sake.

Morals to the story:
1. Don't ever go row by yourself when there is no one out on the water (I would've been soooooooo screwed...).
2. Don't ever tie jewelry to your shoelaces and think that's a good idea.
3. Pay attention to the signs, man!

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Do they know it's Christmastime at all?

So I know Christmas is long gone, but Raul and I have had this ongoing discussion about the political correctness of the Band Aid song "Do they know it's Christmas?"

Doesn't do much to get away from the stereotypes of ribs-sticking-out-of-malnourished-babies and stretching desert images and warlords wreaking havoc on the women and children...here are some of our favorite lines:

"...where the only water flowing is the bitter sting of tears..."
"And the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of DOOM!" (emphasis added)
"Well tonight thank God it's them instead of you" (sing it Bono!)
"There won't be snow in Africa this Christmastime...the greatest gift they'll get this year is life (ooooh)"
"Where nothing ever grows, no rain or rivers flow"
"Here's to them underneath that burning sun"

Matt, you're the lyricull genius, what do you think??

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Hooray!!!! We have a new Miss America!!!!!


The older I get the more obnoxious I find this.
Why does this ridiculousness continue??? The fact that it was broadcasted on CMT should tell us all something right there.

Ugh.

The look on Gloria's face says it all.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Is that a good idea???

This morning on the Today Show they did a whole story on how to implode buildings, i.e., where to put the dynamite, how to get the building to collapse the best, etc.

What are they thinking??

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

"I'm a girl on the verge of a nervous breakdown"...

Hey Matt, I'm following in your Lyric-cull footsteps. This describes my day perfectly.

Spring semester started today. Let the graying of hair continue...in full force.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

crewU!

Check it out, here's a pic of my crew (I would be sitting in Bow 2 position). Hmmm, it doesn't exactly look like we're in sync there.

Oh well.

Ahhh, the days of summer.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Some Pig!

Whoa. So these are the new fluorescent pigs bred in Taiwan.

Does anyone else wonder if they're going to rent these things out for parties???

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

"It's a Nazi hoedown!"

Greetings and Happy New Year, faithful readers. I guess there are at least two of you out there who asked me to update, so voilà.

I've been feeling pretty uninspired since last semester ended. Again, I blame phonology. Although I did mangage to pass, it drained ever fiber of my being and has caused my hair to start turning gray. For real.

And hooray! The next semester begins next week!

So I guess I can give you some hightlights of what's happened since my last post...

Dec 19
Go to campus to turn in my final papers for my sociolinguistics class. While I'm there, check grades and see that I PASSED the bastard class of eternity (phonology)! Have a great conversation with my socio professor and he agrees to work with me on my thesis. Get really happy and excited but then start thinking about how much work I have ahead of me. Feel depressed.

Dec 21
So after going to Louisiana over Thanksgiving and spending way more time in the car than with my family, I asked my mom if she would like to come here for Christmas instead of me going there. One trip to Monroe a year is plenty. She agrees and arrives in Austin.

Dec 23

After spending the previous day shopping, Marilyn (my mom) and I go to San Antonio to hang out on the Riverwalk, see the lights, and meet up with Raul. She and I manage to have one of our celebre marathon fights (still not sure what it was about) but smooth things over in time for dinner.

Dec 24

Unwrap presents, go to Midnight Mass, mom gets über sick and almost has to be taken to the hospital. Merry Christmas.

Dec 25
I go across the street to my cousin's for dinner while my mom stays in bed. Later on she feels good enough to join us.

Dec 26
Marilyn's feeling better and we shop and do that whole thing.

Dec 27
Marilyn leaves.

Dec 28-Dec 30

I really don't remember...but probably recovering from Marilyn's visit and attempting to thoroughly clean out my room. Oh I think I also saw King Kong. Peter, it's called an EDITOR. Hire one.

Dec 31
New Year's eve party with Raul...Happy New Year!

Jan 1
Erm...I think I just hung out all day. Oh, and went to Target.

Jan 2-Jan 9

This has all passed in a blur, but overall:
*Watched the Irish sadly lose to the evil Ohio State Buckeyes in the Fiesta Bowl, laughed at Bowden and Paterno in the Orange Bowl, danced with joy as Texas delivered a crushing blow to EVIL EVIL USC. Muhahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
*Saw 28 Days Later on video, which kind of made me giggle like a little girl.
*Also saw The Producers (hence the Nazi reference in the title)
*Studied a lot of Spanish in the attempt to not be incredibly underprepared next semester when I take an advanced class that I am not qualified for. I'm not optimistic.

Books read over break:
*Fast Food Nation: absolutely horrifying. At first I thought I'd just jump the fence and completely convert vegetarian, but I decided I'd rather just start buying free range meat to support the industry. At least the animals were happy before they were slaughtered.

*The Namesake: I'm in the middle of this one right now...it's pretty damn good.

*Are Men Necessary?: Yes, the new book by liberal sex kitten Maureen Dowd. Rowr. I just bought this yesterday and am oh so excited to read it.

And so that sums up the latest with me. I am not looking forward to next semester...it's going to kill me, probably worse than last semester did. I anticipate way more gray hairs.

Aren't I bright and cheery???

Happy New Year to all of you. I would say that my New Year's resolution is to blog more often, but that would be a big lie, and would also violate my resolution to not tell lies.

Actually, that's a lie also, I didn't make any New Year's resolutions. But Happy New Year regardless, and I'll do my best to update.