Sunday, August 08, 2004

Old Friends...

I am feeling so sentimental tonight.

It's funny how much things change as time goes by. Starting new chapters of your life is very intense. Doing it two years in a row is even more intense. And what's weirder still is when your friends are doing the exact same thing.

Tonight I got together with some old friends from WSBT. It was so nice to see them again, and yet so sad because things have changed a lot since I was there, and things are changing still because they are all leaving--either going to school, moving away, or starting a new job. And while I am ecstatic for these people and what they are moving on to, I am sad, because the world as I've known it is changing. Again.

It's one thing for me to change, but when stuff that I've counted on also starts to change, I get a little freaked out. I guess it's like when you move out of home, and you come back and your parents have turned your bedroom into an office. Fortunately Marilyn has not done that to me yet, but I am waiting for (and dreading) the day. It's that whole, "there's no coming home again" thing.

This summer back in South Bend has been really weird. As I've mentioned before, it's been sort of like a safe and comfortable womb. Maybe it's because I got sentimental while I was away, maybe because it's summertime, maybe it's because I've been a lot more social than before, but I've just felt really sad about saying goodbye again, and have started planning my trips back. The thought of staying here has fluttered in my mind more than a couple times.

But then I am always given a stark jolt of reality, like tonight for example, and I see other people in my life moving on, and I know that I need to do the same. I don't want to get left behind.

I think actually that I've done a pretty good job of not staying static, but it gets tiring sometimes. And I'm sure when I finally do "settle" down, I will be bitching and moaning about how bored I am.

For now though, I will let myself feel the sentimentality, enjoy my last week in South Bend, and prepare myself for Austin.

But I can't help but think that this whole saying-goodbye-to-South-Bend thing would be so much easier if it was winter.


At 7:43 AM, Blogger Carol said...

Hey you...
Yes, I'm sure it would be MUCH easier if it was winter.

As to moving on...well, you're so right. Everyone else is moving on, it's time for us to do it too. Though I feel a bit slow in that process sometimes.

Remember that corny kids poem? "Make new friends but keep the old. One is silver and the other is gold"

We'll always love you, no matter where you are. New friends are awesome, and old ones are there for you through it all.


At 10:18 AM, Blogger Court said...


I do remember that poem! We sang it in Brownies! In rounds!


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